Zim Diaries Part Two

The night I landed in our beloved Zimbabwe ndakaona mashura vakomana! We are in trouble people… I thought kuti pamwe iropa rehuku randibata coz magetsi akaenda my first few hours in Zim. Shura racho rakanyanya pakuti tanga tiri muhotera husiku ihwohwo. No electricity in a hotel? I simply could not believe it. What a way to start off my holiday! I remember my beloved mother saying to me “Ko wati waonei hako?” There was no need to say more. I knew exactly what she meant. I began to have that uneasy feeling when you are out of your comfort zone. Nechemumwoyo ndichingoti “Dai nguva yamhanya ndangodzokera, zvekuno haa kana!” Ko ndanga ndati ndaonei zvechokwadi?

The next day kusvika kumba back to the place I love to call Sleepy Hollow (that is Gweru for you, don’t ask) after travelling a seemingly endless 250km or so from Harare what did we find? Another blackout. *sigh* All I could say was “Gees, thank you very much to whoever is responsible. I am having a beautiful holiday.” Can you sense the undertone in that? My Dad being the man he is (can turn any bad situation into a light-hearted affair) says to me “Ah maSupporter ejongwe maakuzviona kuti chibhakera chenyu chaakukurovai ka?”. I can almost see you laughing while you are reading this. Ndakazvionera ndega veduwe-e.

I wanted to get back on that plane I tell you. As time went on it was a very simple day to day thing kuti magetsi aende. Izvozvi muZimbabwe every town, city or village kune magetsi there is a timetable yekuti aende. Yes, ZESA goes at given times in a given place and people are used to that now. Kana neni ndakatojairawo. Kwedu Tuesday neThursday manheru makenduru nekuvesa moto panze. ZvehuSalad ndakasiya kuno kudiaspora muchiverenga kudai, ndakatotema huni (haa horait we have a gardener at home who took care of that, don’t be fooled but getsi remuZimbabwe harina musarurwa chero kumba kwaMayor anoenda).

The bigger the city the more the blackouts. Very simple indeed. Sekutaura kwevaneruzivo "it is only set to get worse!" As a result I missed some World Cup games (I don’t know if I can really forgive these guys seeing that this tournament occurs only once every four years). Gadzirirai hama dzenyu maVISA kana muchikwanisa shuwa hamusati machiona chakatadzisa imbwa kuseka kuhukura ichigona!

I found myself getting used to the system so quickly it was like I had not gone anywhere! Twumukoto twuya twandakasiya a year ago ndakawana twuripo. That is when my holiday truly began. Zvinhu zvakatanga kufamba manje. Reconnecting myself with everyone else, the familiar faces yet again. Munhu wese aingobvunza “Ko wakadzoka riini? Where were you? Haven’t seen you in a while.” Then waiwanawo vamwe vanokuti “Ko wakadzokerei?” Dai vaiziva kuti hakuna kusina nhamo yako ka vaisambodaro. Oh yes, and the one that became somewhat cliché, “You are back, ko wakativigirei?” Seemed everyone expected something for some odd reason (not like I care but with the way things are I do not blame them). Most of them think kuti being out here is a breeze and money ‘falls’ from the sky and all we really do is go outside and pick it up. "I wish"

Ndakati ndatumwa kuSupermarket kunotenga grocery the prices were a straight shocker. With three extra zeros suffixed to every price, haa ma1. Ndapedza kutenga zvangu I’m asking the cashier for a ‘paperbag’ and she says to me “Mukwasha muri kurarama muZimbabwe ipi? Aya ari apa kana muchida "one" riri kuita $30 000.” Ndakangoburitsa mari ndinyerere ko ndipo pandaizomuudza kuti ndiri kubva kuAustralia here?

Throughout the whole holiday more often than once I found myself ndichinonotsa kufamba kweQueue wherever I was ndichitadza kuverenga mari. It almost made me feel stupid but the number of notes I had to count in a day was totally ridiculous. You have to be one heck of a Math student in school to get through each day munyika yedu, no lie.

Ukaona chaunoda kana une mari yacho just buy it! Usafunge zvakawanda chingotenga chete. Chances are ukati “Ndozotenga mangwana”, either unowana chisisipo, price yakwira kana kuti unenge usisina mari yacho. PaATM the maximum amount yaunokwanisa kuburitsa is $2 000 000 at any one time chero bank ripi zvaro. In a day the total you can withdraw is $10 000 000. Sounds like a lot huh? Hapana kana mari apo, kuiwana $10 000 000 iyoyo is unlimited toil though. Those ATM queues are endless all day long.

To withdraw an amount of $50 000 000 or more from your account you have to write a letter to the branch manager explaining why you need the money which could either be turned down or approved. Imagine ipapo kuendesa mwana kuCreche (or Kindergarten) could cost up to $30 000 000/month. Ko kuzoti vekuchikoro? A friend was telling me kuti at Uni the number of people dropping out keeps rising. Not saying kuti chikoro chaoma but they simply cannot afford it seeing that fees are ranging between $55 000 000 and $75 000 000 a semester. Panotodiwa minamato apa.

Let’s talk prices here.
Cellphones:
Motorola RAZR V3, V360 - $100 000 000, Motorola V550 - $50 000 000, Motorola V600 - $75 000 000
Nokia 1100 - $25 000 000, Nokia 3200 - $60 000 000, Nokia N91 - $450 000 000

Unbelievable, huh? True Story.

Zim Diaries Part One

The reason i went back home to Zimbabwe was very simple but crucial to me. I had had such a terrible semester my confidence was low and i needed a boost! With the forex problems in Zimbabwe coupled with the University wanting their dues from me, all it spelt in my life was STRESS! Half the semester I was just jumping from office block to office block explaining, 'financial situation' yangu to these guys. All i wanted was peace of mind and learn with no worries about payments. And thats the one thing i never got all semester. I needed a change, see my parents and fall back on someone. As if to stress the point when i got home all everyone ever really said to me was 'ii waonda shamwari' . Ko kundisiya nhai imi?

Dai zvakapera mazuva ekutanga ka. Till the day i came back chero wandaiona aingoti wakaonda wena. Mufunge, i was never fat anyway but, mukuonda imomo already they could see that i lost weight futi! It gave me a good laugh and also motivated me kuti next time ka, ndive a stronger person to face my challenges mudiaspora. So that was part of the therapy i needed. Seeing familiar faces and the number of people looking up to me for being the one who managed to 'escape' nhamo yemuZim was even more, made me realise that as much as things are tough, i still have a lot to do out here. Talk about a remedy for all the problems.

One department i had faltered greatly out here was religion. Going back home to the church i call 'home' was revealing. I felt like i wanted to know God again after those many days of giving excuses ndichiti 'I have work saka i can not go to church' etc. This time i had NO excuses not to go. I made the best of it and the times i went to church gave me more strength and God was just showing me the signs that life will never be easy but, also never to lose faith or focus. Now that im back it means a new challenge: no more silly excuses to distance myself away form Him, i still need God in my life to make it.

Talk about surprises.. Last year ndairara mumaQueue efuel nevamwe. Gore rino hakuna iyoyo. Fuel mazariro ayakaita asi kudhura kani. Cheapest we could find was $430 000 a litre. Elsewhere it could even go up to $600 000 a litre. Saka to fill a tank would need roughly $25 000 000 for most cars and considering that on average people earn around $35 000 000 a month it simply means to be able to keep a car running you have to be among the rich folk. Put 2 and 2 together and you get the reason as to why fuel queues do not exist anymore...it is available but less people can afford it now! Personally i think it is better that way, rather it be expensive and available than cheap and nowhere to be located! (Disagree if you wish, i did this in Economics this very year)

The other big surprise for me was the way people seem to carry a lot more brief cases and bags around. Ok, not too long ago we had every joke possible about how Zambians carry money in wheel barrows to buy bread and end up exchanging the wheel barrows for the bread. I'm sorry to say but we are not far from the jokes being reality. Wallet-makers are definitely out of business now. Who needs one? Yes, they (or should i say we) now carry bags with money in Zimbabwe if we are to have any decent amount of money on us. As you read this ndiri kutonzwa musana so-o (kutamba hangu ndanga ndatojaira). Our dollars are millions and our cents are now thousands. Zvamunoona kudai kombi chaiyo yave $65 000 - $100 000 mufunge, chingwa $150 000, Kokora (Soft drinks) $100 000 and so forth. Kune vanoda zvechirungu-rungu maPizza aya Large $2 200 000 zvichikwira. We need a Saviour in the place i tell you.

Musically...ok to be honest i hate to say this. Zimbabwe was DEAD. Quite a siginificant number of the same generic so and sos we heard 2 years ago are still on the radio rotation list. Gees what a development. So let me stop hating (though i said all this in complete honesty). Now that international music can be played it is somewhat a breath of fresh air. Well, for those who have not yet been exposed to the diaspora. Maybe it is just me but the DJs back home just loooooooooove to play washed out, 'we've had enough of it' typa music. I mean Let Me Love U WAS a lovely song, WAS. Get me? Eventually i couldn't even bother to tune in. Radio just sucked (forgive me if im a bit too blunt, i don't actually care).

On to our very own Urban Grooves scene dubbed Urban Guvhu whatever that means. (Before we knock that one, too bad i missed the Rocqui/Pauline/ Shyleen drama. Point to note ever noticed how the two ladies names rhyme, not that it matters lol dai ndakaziva would have stayed a day or 2 longer ndakauya ne1st hand info chaiyo, fresh). First thing is i don't have anything against these guys (ok any artist really) maCD aakuita $2 500 000. Anotenga ndiani? So what happens when they want to make money but as much as people want to buy very few can afford it. So can music be a career in Zim yes or no? Take your pick. I don't think so